Amen for the Spirits

A review of the yellow pages in my local phone book for Towanda, PA finds only 28 entries under “taverns.” In Bradford (our fair County), there are almost five times as many places to pray to a spirit than there are places to consume some spirits. Also, one can pray anywhere. That’s right – anywhere. There are no laws prohibiting praying anywhere. Any student, teacher, judge, or employee – anyone – can pray silently anywhere, anytime they want, even while they operate an automobile. I don’t recommend praying while driving because, as with other forms of wireless communication, it may distract the driver.

To the contrary, there are many laws that prohibit the consumption of alcoholic beverages in many locations or during certain activities. Driving while worshiping the wrong “spirit” can get you in a world of trouble. However, if you’re at home, you can worship both “spirits” simultaneously to your hearts content.

So, rather than needing more places to pray, this county needs more places to drink. I propose we start with the places of worship, then the courthouse, followed by the schools (taking care to limit the spirits to only those of legal age.) Maybe some liquid spirits will mellow those who want to impose their religious beliefs on others who merely want to worship, or to not worship, in their own way.
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